What comes next?...

Well, I've had my third attempt at my blood tests and, so far, they haven't contacted me, so I'm assuming that they were fine this time.
Hubby had to cancel his appointment as he couldn't get the time off work and, until he has had his done, nothing more can happen. They will only send the referral once all bloods are complete. Starting to get impatient now as it seems that he isn't going to be given the time off any time soon.
I'm still hoping that some little miracle may just happen and it'll all happen naturally, but I guess that after this long it is just wishful thinking. I can still keep my fingers crossed.
Didn't tell my parents about it in the end. It's kind of hard to talk about to people you know, let alone your parents. A bit embarrassing!
Hopefully he can get his bloods sorted soon, then I'll feel a bit more like we are starting to get somewhere.

How can it be so hard to do something so natural?

Poem...

When it's just not enough

I have plans and ideas, I strive to achieve,I have a desire and a dream, I want to believe,But dreams and ideas are not enough.

I have time and patience, the longing to be,I have all the love, but why not me?Because love and patience are not enough.

I'd give all I have, I'd sacrifice it all,To live this dream, to not have to fall,But this will never be enough.

I'm losing my dream, I'm losing my fight,The desire is still there, but I can't see the light,When life is not enough.

Internet

I thought I'd have a look on the Internet to find out more information on what to expect from our referral. Sounds a bit daunting!
The questions they will ask are all a bit embarrassing. It says they are going to want to talk about our sex life, my periods and other such stuff that you don't generally bring up in everyday conversation, so I'll look forward to that!?!

The girls at work are starting to ask questions about why I have to go for so many blood tests at the moment, but I can't quite bring myself to tell them about it, just keep making excuses. I find it hard to talk to people about it because it makes me feel like a failure. Making a baby is the most basic of human instincts and we can't do it.

No matter where I look at the moment there seems to be babies or pregnant women.

Why can't it be me?

The start of the journey...

I've set up this blog to try to show people what it involves to go through fertility testing and treatments.
This is the begining of what I think is going to be a long and difficult time for me & my husband.

After speaking to my GP a couple of weeks ago about how we are trying to conceive our first child, I was told that the chances of this happening naturally for us were very slim. We have not used any form of protection since just after we got married on 14 February 2004, and apparently, if it hasn't happened yet, it probably isn't going to. I'm devistated. Starting sa family together is such a basic part of life, but we can't do it.
The doctor advised referal to a specialist for testing & possible treatment, but before this referal can be done we will need to have some blood tests done. I had my tests done a few days later, but was then contacted to be told that some of the tests had been missed & that I would have to go back in to have these ones done too. I went back a week later for them, but when I got home that evening I got a call to say they had made a mistake with them and that they would have to redo them, again!
I have now booked in for Tuesday 23 September to have them repeated & my hubby is going to be having his done at the same time.

Not sure what will happen after this. I was told the referal will be sent once our results are back, so I guess we'll just have to wait and see.

I know this is going to be a difficult journey for us. I'm already feeling emotional & I've already cried at work and it's hardly even started!